Wednesday, April 22, 2015

How to use your car to survive a zombie apocalypse

You have home insurance, food storage and a stash of cash in your closet. You’re prepared for the worst — a fire, flood or even a devastating earthquake. But have you ever thought how you’ll handle the zombie apocalypse?
That’s weird. According to experts, the zombie apocalypse isn’t a matter of if, but when. If you’re not prepared, don’t worry; all you need to survive it may be sitting in your garage. Your car may just be your saving grace when the dead come walking.
Warn the others
When you’re outrunning zombies, you don’t have the time to make house calls warning your friends and community members; you need to get the message out fast. Paul Revere had a horse but today, if you’ve got a car and a full tank of gas, you have the ability to warn as many people as possible. Spray paint a warning or attach a poster to your car to tell others to get to safety. Even better? Fix your car with an air horn or megaphone. The living will thank you.
Photo credit: Screenshot
Drive a weapon of mass destruction
If you didn’t know, it’s kind of hard to kill something that’s already dead. So your game plan should be more about debilitating the zombie threat rather than killing it. That’s where your car can be your best friend — and most lethal weapon. Think about it: How else could you manage to plow through an entire herd of living dead whilst keeping yourself (and your human loved ones) safe? And since zombies aren't exactly agile, they’ll be down before they ever knew what (literally) hit them.
Stash the goods
When the zombie apocalypse (inevitably) ensues, you’re going to need a lot to survive — namely food, water and weapons. But holding on to those coveted items can be a tricky venture, what with a host of desperate people about. That’s where the trunk of your car can come in handy. You’ve got a place to stash jumbo cans of pinto beans and mega rolls of toilet paper. If you want to be especially sneaky, fill up the spare tire space under the floor of the trunk.
Go off-roading
Got a four-wheel drive? That’s good news for you and yours. When the zombies invade, they’re likely to take to the roads — along with all the humans trying to run (or drive) away. That’s where you and your jacked-up pickup truck or SUV can get ahead of the herd. Load the family in the truck and high-tail it for the hills, wilderness, forest or desert. As long as you’ve got the supplies (see above), you don’t need roads — or what’s left of civilization — to survive.
Put your alarm to work
They may be mean, ruthless and violent, but one thing is for sure: zombies aren’t exactly stealth. That makes it pretty tough for one to sneakily pry open your car door with a wire hanger. And since most car alarm systems these days are pretty sophisticated — not to mention sensitive — they can really come in handy when the dead have taken over the streets. When you’re spending the night in the car, you won’t have to worry about being jolted from sleep by a set of zombie incisors to the calf; your alarm will tip you off long before you become a late-night snack.

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