Sunday, December 23, 2012


God rest ye undead gentlemen










Up on the Zombie

Up on the housetop, snipers pause
It’s a zombie Santa Claus
Dragging a bag that’s leaking toys
Ignored by undead girls and boys
Ew-ew-ew! What the hell?
Ew-ew-ew! Don’t he smell?
Up on the housetop, snipers fire
Santa’s head goes like a tire
First, should we go out to recon?
Oh, survivors, are they gone?
All those toys just out of reach
Maybe there’s one for us each
Ew-ew-ew! What the hell?
Ew-ew-ew! What’s that smell?
Up on the housetop, snipers wait
See if we will take the bait
Next we have to form a plan
Who will go out? Who’s our man?
No one wants to, too much fear
Screw those presents! Where’s the beer?
Ew-ew-ew! What the hell?
Ew-ew-ew! Zombies smell!
Up on the housetop, snipers cheer
They shot Santa in the ear

Carol of the Zombies

Zombies are here
Spreading the fear
All night and day
Run, run away
Guts, blood and gore
Oh, what a bore
Ammo is gone
Winter is long
Sit ’round the fire
Ghouls never tire
Beer is our friend
Cheer without end
Shotguns at hand
For every man
Aim for the head
Then, they stay dead
Shoot every last zombie
‘Til they’re all down
And stay in the ground
Very very very very messy
Very very very very messy
Just wait ‘em out
Just let ‘em shout
We will survive
We’re still alive
All night and day
Run, run away
Guts, blood and gore
Oh, what a bore
Sit ’round the fire
Ghouls never tire
Beer is our friend
Cheer without end
Shotguns at hand
For every man
Oh, how they blow
When their heads go
Shoot every last zombie
‘Til they’re all down
And stay in the ground
Very very very very messy
Very very very very messy
Zombies are here
Spreading the fear
Aim for the head
Then, they stay dead
Ewwww…..

The Zombie Song

Zombies roasting on an open pyre
Undead nipping at your toes
Ghoulies moan with their eyes all a-glow
Happy hunting
Haaaappy hunting
Haaaaaappy hunting…toooooo…yooooouuuu

We Wish You a Zombie Christmas

We wish you a loaded shotgun
We wish you a loaded shotgun
We wish you a loaded shotgun
And a whole case of beer
Good hunting we hope
For you and your kin
Good hunting of zombies
And American beer
We wish you some high explosive
We wish you a bag of ANFO
We wish you a brick of C4
And a full keg of beeeeerrrrr!

Jingle Zombies

Dashing through the streets
With undead at my back
I fear I won’t survive
This first zombie attack
I can’t stop to reload
My shotgun’s blown its wad
I’m fresh out of explosives and
My machete’s whopper-jawed
Ooooohhhh….
Rotting corpse
Rotting corpse
Undead on the way
Oh, what fun it is to shoot
A zombie from a sleigh, hey!
Rotting corpse
Rotting corpse
Ghoulies in the snow
One looks just like Auntie Ruth
And one like Uncle Joe
I headed for the church
Dropping weapons as I ran
And just when all was lost
I saw a speeding van
It was my best friend, Dave
As drunk as hell and pissed
He plowed down twenty ghouls, then cried
“I can’t believe I missed!”
Oooohhhh…
Rotting corpse
Rotting corpse
Undead on the way
Oh, what fun it is to shoot
A zombie from a sleigh, hey!
Rotting corpse
Rotting corpse
Ghoulies in the snow
One looks just like Auntie Ruth
And one like Uncle Joe

Rockin Around the Zombie Tree

Rockin around the zombie pyre
At the undead roasting fest
Zombies as far as you can see
Hope you wore your orange vest
Rockin around the zombie pyre
Pile ‘em high as you can throw
Later we’ll have a keg of beer
‘N piss our names into the snow

Zombie Bells

Zombies moaning
Undead groaning
It’s the end of the world
In the air there’s a smell of flesh burning
People screaming
Zombies teeming
It’s a meat smorgasbord
And from every street corner we shout
Kill ‘em all
Kill ‘em all
It’s hunting time ‘cross the nation
Shoot ‘em down
Salt the ground
Soon they will stay in their graves


Let it Zombie

Oh, the zombies outside are frightful
But the fortress is delightful
And since it’s our brand new home
Let ‘em moan
Let ‘em moan
Let ‘em moan!
Oh, they show no signs of dropping
But their heads will soon be popping
As soon as I switch ammo
Let ‘em moan
Let ‘em moan
Let ‘em moan!
When they’re finally blown to bits
How I hate to go out in the gore
But as long as we have some Schlitz
Nobody here will be bored
Oh, the whiners have stopped their crying
But the ghoulies just aren’t dying
So since I’m tired to the bone
Let ‘em moan
Let ‘em moan
Let ‘em moan!

Rudolph the Zombie-Nosed Reindeer

Rudolph the Zombie Reindeer
Had a very rotten nose
I often like to shoot it
Just to see how far it blows
All of the local children
Used to poke at him with flames
But then the undead Rudolph
Munched upon their puny brains
Then one stinky summer’s eve
Hunters came to play
Rudolph with his corpse so rank
Got run over by a tank
Now the few local children
Know that zombies aren’t for fun
They learned a valuable lesson
Never be withooouuuut aaaaaa guuuuuuuun!










*thanks to Molly Burkhart for her great songs!

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