Thursday, January 15, 2015

The 13 Best Garden Tools For Slaying Zombies During The Apocalypse

Terrific … there’s just been a zombie apocalypse and you need weapons. The good news is, you're smart. While everyone else is trying to gather up guns and ammo, you head to Home Depot or your backyard shed to go old fashioned on the zombie horde’s asses. Here’s the deal, ammo runs out, but garden tools, just like diamonds, are forever. Take a look at your best options.


 zombie chainsaw
As long as you have gas, you’ll be cuttin’ through zombies like butter. It’s loud and may draw them out, but damn if it isn’t fun.

Snow Blower

 zombie snowblower
Who needs snow? This baby plows through zombies like … well … a snow-blower. Check out them blades!


 zombie axe
It’s a classic, really. Good for splittin’ undead skulls.

Hand Rake

Here’s an interesting choice. The hand-rake gets you three points of contact and one blow should take the zombie down fast.


An updated version of a tool that’s been around forever. Good for lopping off heads and piercing skulls.

Hedge Trimmer

Not a good first choice but if you have electricity and a long cord, it'll make a zombie mess and trim your hedge.

Trim Shears

 zombie shears
These pointy bad boys take some finesse but will do the trick.


 zombie machete
A very popular choice that will keep both the living and the dead at bay.


 zombie pitchfork
A nice long stick to keep distance between you and the target. Nice choice.


 zombie nailgun
As long as you have pneumatic cartridges, you will be nailin’ zombie skulls to the wall.


 zombie hammer
You've got to get in close, but the effect is still the same — dead zombie.


 zombie hoe
Anything with a long handle and sharp metal end is your friend.


 zombie lawnmower
This is not very practical, but if you have crawlers, it should make easy work of them.

What will you use to survive the zombie apocalypse? Let me know in the comments below!

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